platonic friendship fail :]

        It happened just as I thought it would. Except I wasn't sure that it would happen. I'm never sure until it hits me in the face, maybe because it's terribly silly to be wrong on these kinds of things. On Tuesday LE and I went to Oberweis, then to his house. We chatted for a while and then watched some TV. There's something about the space and the air that shifts when both people know they want to kiss each other. Everything becomes amplified and suddenly your mouth is sticky and you can't quite breathe gracefully enough and you can't control your eyebrows. It's the most peculiar feeling. I still didn't think anything was going to happen though. I sure as heck wasn't going to make the first move. The credits for the Simpson's episode we were watching came on when he asked sheepishly, "soo.. would you ever consider doing stuff as more than friends?" Once my response seemed positive enough to that, he continued with, "so if I kissed you right now would that be okay?" I said yes and then we made out for the next hour or more and I was almost late to badminton tryouts again.
         LE and I recently started hanging out recently in a purely Platonic fashion. If we liked each other then, we didn't know it. He's just always been someone I can talk to easily, and I think I was that for him too. We just started liking each other randomly at the same time, even if I wouldn't admit it, not even to myself. He told me that sometimes it's okay to just go with the flow, and that he likes me a lot. I wouldn't have been happy constantly forcing myself to not like him, and I just feel so happy and relaxed with him. There needn't be any barriers. While he was driving me to school for badminton afterwords, he told me a few secrets. I knew more secrets than most people did anyway, but I still feel like he has a lot. They might not be secrets, but just things about his life that he isn't entirely open about or that just don't come up. I'm excited to get to know him even better. I can't wait until we are completely comfortable with each other. The first session was great, gosh it was wonderful, and once that initial unease wears off everything will be even more perfect. I won't let it become a purely physical relationship though. Neither will LE. We are too mentally connected for it to become only physical. The sexual component is only a happy supplement to the great companionship and whatever that we already had. Us being like this is still surreal. I guess maybe we just need to do it a few more times before it finally sinks in.

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