My mother really drives me up a wall. Is it any wonder that I am this screwed up? While I was growing up, I never thought anything of it really. That's not strange because when you're a kid your parents are your world pretty much. I didn't have my own mind, and I didn't know that a mother could be any other way. Even now I find myself questioning my own sanity. Could I really be the product of such a CRAZY PERSON? She is the epitome of the sucker of snake oils, the availability heuristic, and confirmation bias. I don't even feel that giving examples would justify her illogicality because they have been my whole life. How can I have stood for this after I developed my own mind since I was like what, twelve years old?
The fact that I have dealt with this so long coupled with the fact that I am going to move out in a year makes everything so much more irritating. It's all I can do to keep from talking back and trying to correct her. I know she won't change, but it's simply not in my nature to ever give up on people. One word of retaliation from me will conjure up an extra two hours of bitching from her. I know this, and yet I still can't stop. It's hard to conceive that a person so irrational exists.
How could I be a product of such insanity? I would never blame my dad for cheating on her, I feel so bad for her. When my sister and I eventually move out, he still has to spend the rest of his life with her. I'm not sure why he married her. I really can't see any reason other than that she used to be sort of good looking. Well actually there is one reason maybe. She wouldn't put out unless they got married so maybe that's why.
Sorry this has been a terrible and disorganized post but I am just so frustrated with having to live with her.