12.16.2012

snarky email followup

My mom's reply was a rant about how it still was a lot of money that they were paying, (which I did not and will never disagree with,) in addition to the oft-spouted stories of how she worked so hard through college to pay for her own tuition  of $40,000 and how she is so thrifty. $40,000??????? I asked my dad about this and he said her tuition was $11,000 and he paid for it one year.
Just a bit ago she told me that I need to learn more about "accounting things" because I just don't understand interest and something about retirement benefits and so her initial figures about tuition were correct. Maybe she is right and I have a gross misperception of the world and finances!!!! When UChicago tells me $30,000 it is all really a trick and it is actually $70,000 somehow and I am just too stupid and uneducated to understand!!!!
I don't even know why I continue trying to be sassy to her. She thinks she has proven herself to be in the right because I literally said "okay bye" and walked away from her. Every time I try to make her see the light, it only becomes more justification for her to be "disappointed" in me and think of me as a disobedient, disrespectful monster.Why am I so hung up on this? She is obviously an idiot, either that or I'm the biggest ignorant buttwipe who knows nothing about money and either way no amount of me sassing her is going to change that. Everyone who knows her can see that she's beyond hope. My sister is learning to never give any merit to what she says, and her own parents know that she's an idiot. So much of what she so sickening that it's almost comical.

At least I get to go to college though. At least I get to move out and be away from her and never speak to her again if I choose to do so. My dad, on the other hand, has to live with her presumably until one of them dies. He's given up. I told him about the incident and he told me to stop correcting her, and that when it comes to numbers, she is always wrong, and always exaggerating. He'll never be rid of her because it would hurt his pride too much to divorce her. My mom has yelled threats of divorce so many times, but she's never serious. He is such a logical person whose only sensitivities involve classical music. I don't know how he sleeps in the same bed as she does. My dad has told me that love and companionship are not real. Status and money are concrete and they are what will make a marriage last. I hope he honestly believes this, even though most people would say the exact opposite. I wonder when he started thinking this way. It's sad, but I hope it helps him cope with his life. I just wish he would stop making it apply to mine.

I think I've found good companionship and maybe even "love," whatever that is. I hope it lasts. My worst fear in the world would be to end up like my parents. Psychology says I will. I'm scared. I'm too passive to break the cycle.

What a stupid and unorganized post.

-T.

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